Homestretch #3!

ICM physical exam assessment is over! Finally feel like we are getting the ball rollin' to wrap up semester 3. Thank goodness. I got an A, but got a couple points off for how my technique took a long time - yada yada - I didn't make any "real" mistakes - yada, yada - I got an A so whatever lol. After, I had our LAST behavioral lab of the semester (which was the best of them all!) where we got to practice for our patient history oral exam we have next week. I feel much better about this and much less nervous.

Nerves, lol. Yeah, that is a funny thing. As comfortable as I thought I would be the adrenaline really hindered my flow today. But live and learn. I feel so much better and oddly feel more like I have taken huge steps this semester to becoming a physician. It looks so easy to do things like we are tested on but it really takes alot of out of you!!! I'm also really getting better at worrying about myself and not other people and how well they did on exams/assessments. To me I always felt like I had to be the best at everything, an impossible feat where it leads to CONSTANT disappointment in myself. I still do this sometimes but I get over it more easily. I never want to fully let that go because I think a little disappointment/let downs have lead me to push myself harder. But over the past while I have learned it is about doing your best at everything and learning how to pick yourself up after a disappointment. It's all about how you rise after you fall and boy - I have fallen more times than I can count. But I have never given up and have always pushed myself harder.

I can see my personality changing alot since I have been here. I even told my Mom that I look at pictures of myself from last year and I don't really feel like the same person at all. I've grown so much and feel like such a better person just being here - putting aside all of the med school pride lol. I really feel that nothing will ever compare to this experience and whenever something seems so hard just think about my time here and everything I have had to overcome mentally, physically and especially emotionally.

What a ride. But at least it is almost over - at least this semester. As for now, I am looking forward to Friday! It's my 23rd birthday, which of course I wish I was home for, but after class it will be an afternoon/night to relax and party! So excited!

One thing at a time I guess here. I still have so much to learn, not just here in med school but about myself as well and what more I am capable of... I have a feeling it is alot and much more than I have been giving myself credit for...