Second time is a charm?

COMP #2 is over. I just don't know how to read this one. I cannot explain how hard I worked for this exam but some of the questions on that form... Oy. Maybe it is just the way people feel after exams all the time. I just can't remember how I felt after the first one. Maybe I will take a trip down to my old blog on it, haha. Pharm actually wasn't bad on this one... But jeeze who knows. All I know is the opinion of the 5 here that took it, which share my same thoughts. I wonder how it was in Miami? Dominica? My second practice exam - I swore I did so awful but really improved ALOT so maybe it is like this too?

To be truthful, I am just trying to think what would be the purpose of me failing. I can't change what has already happened. What's done is done. At least this time I know how hard I worked. It just seems so ironic that when I really wasn't studying hard like last time (be it that I was just SO thrilled to be home), I still pulled a 62%. Now, when I worked so very hard - I could do worse? I guess today, I am just trying to see why it would work out that way - just to prepare myself for the worst. Failing this means alot: no Saginaw program, no Step next month, possible COMP #3 and worst of all practically impossible to graduate in 2010. Okay, okay lady - slow down, right? Haha, I know I know, but hey you chose to read this blog and I am giving you exactly what is going through my mind right now. Anyhoo - I'm just wondering what lesson I was meant to learn if that were to happen. I am just not sure what it would be. I worked so hard, tried and tried.

Finally, upon getting home I was thinking that maybe I am just supposed to have faith. I prayed so much and put so much of myself into studying - I just need to believe that it is possible and stop being so negative. Maybe it went just fine and I have nothing to worry about. Of course I would love to do better but I would be lying if I said I wouldn't be happy with a 64% passing score. I hear though that just like the practice exams I have taken, there is a curve to US students, depending on the difficulty of the form taken. Far be it for me to just whine about how hard it was if I didn't prepare but it really was a tough one. Of course, there were some very easy questions, but how many I'm not sure. Maybe the ones I got right, everyone else did too and it doesn't matter. Anyway, I just remember getting my second practice exam score and being shocked of how I improved! It was so much harder, it seemed than the first one. So I am wondering if it was a curve based on it being a harder form.

Oy, these thoughts can go on and on. I am glad it is done though. I know this time was so much different. I slept well, ate breakfast, was very relaxed and confident going in, no traveling around the country or taking taxis and getting lost in Miami - and I worked my "tail" off - seriously... Things were so different this time. So will it be reflected when my scores come in? I honestly feel that I am so ready to move on to the next step of my journey. I just pray for the faith and belief that all the hard work will pay off...

Last day of 5th semester!

It is over. 5th semester is over, what?? And WOOOOO - what a last day! Today was full of learning procedures: IVs, central lines, IOs, LPs, blood draws, fiberglass splinting and more intubations and codes! It was very cool and the simulators were awesome. At the end of the day our teacher Dr. V told us that we were free to go unless we would like the chance to practice on real people! Umm, yeah! Everyone was so shy after the demo and no one wanted to stick anyone - after all the rule is, "If you want to stick someone, you have to be willing to be stuck by someone else." Great rule. I volunteered to go first and stuck, you guessed it, Dr. V and did my first blood draw! Then after, I got to stick him again and start an IV! He was such a trooper, haha. But as agreed, I let my classmate stick me afterwards. I was so happy to have my "first time jitters" done and over with. I feel like I can without a doubt go in and feel confident doing it again and looking forward to it!

It was such a great way to spend our last day of lecture. Now all that is left is my exams Monday-Wednesday, then move home! I am ready to get my last weekend of studying in before the big exam and am looking forward to relaxing with my sweetie before my last go at the books! I should probably get going though - he will be here any minute!!!

Revived and Ready to go!

Man that was a rough few days! I just couldn't get as much work done as I wanted! But now, I am back on track. I just finished my BLS/ACLS course (a whole day lol) and passed my exam. I am now certified! It was a very cool exam. Besides the two written exams we had to take, we had to go in groups to the simulation lab and each take our turn running a code. Very cool. Mind you it was not the perfect example by any means but really was, well an adrenaline rush and exciting to have a run at it! Now knowing not only drugs but moving into dosages is really yet another step in our prep for clinicals. Slowly but surely, we are getting ready for that next transition... Crazy that it is here so soon!

As for now, I have my final list of what to look over before my exam Tuesday and am making good progress thus far. Feeling confident and just ready to kick this exam out and get home. Of course, my homecoming week would not be complete without my 5th semester final exam and epidemiology exam (mind you, a 2 hour exam over 2 lectures lol) but I am sure it will all work out just fine. The COMP is my misson next week and everything else must take a back seat.

Today I had such a great morning. I woke up finding out my peds rotation was cancelled. Yes, sure would have been a nice experience, but we had been cancelled on once already and a few other classmates, when their rotations were cancelled - they didn't have to reschedule. My luck, I did. Being days away from the most important test thus far and going home, I was so happy for the extra study time! I definitely made use of it! After waking up, I found the front desk of the hotel put two cards under my door! Thanks Mom and Tim! Love you both tons!!! I swear their support is SO appreciated! Such a great start to the day! Today, I really was motivated as my Tony will be here tomorrow! It has been a rough week on me and when he told me he was coming made my week! I know I could make it until the end without him here but it means so much whenever I can see him and it recharges me - big time. He will be here for just a day but just enough for me to get back to work, finish here and move my bootie back home!

So today, I have looked through my practice exams one more time, started my flashards and continued on with my First Aid (this time knowing more what I am looking at then just aimlessly memorizing any detail to cram in my head lol). Still working, while watching the Food Network (Unwrapped!). Tomorrow is our last day of class where one of my favorite teachers who works in the ER (all my favs are ER docs lately, lol) is going to teach us more procedures - central lines, LPs, IVs etc. It will be a nice add-on to the catheters and intubation training and a "fun" last day!

Anyhoo - back to work, the end is near and 6th semester is almost in sight! Okay, I think we can lose the "semester" talk and just go for rotations! Please keep me in prayers and thoughts Tuesday if you can - nervous but confident at the same time!

P.S. Good luck down on the island - last push!!! Keep studying, homeward bound soon! :D

Feeling burnt...

This weekend, while semi-productive thus far, has left me feeling extremely burnt out. One week out from the COMP and I am just beat. Luckily, I know myself and that I will kick it into a high gear until the test but boy - I am getting mighty tired and ready for a break. Alot of my friends are out for my friends' Bachelor/Bachelorette parties - I wish I was there! I know it is good study-wise that I stayed here but I hate missing events, especially when it is as big as this! This is the first couple in our giant group of friends that are getting married! 2 weeks from today! So excited for them!!! Unless anyone gets engaged soon, I think Tony and I are next in line for next year! YAYYY! :) This summer will be the summer of wedding planning!

Anyhoo - I've been asked about how I feel on the new USMLE testing that is supposedly going to happen in the future. Basically instead of taking Step 1, 2, 3. It will be Pretty much 1&2 combined at the end of the third year and then take Step 3. I honestly don't know a ton about it but from my understanding, it doesn't seem like a great solution. I think being tested before entering clinicals is a great way to prepare students for their rotations. Without Step 1 before, I can see students slacking a bit more and just cramming at the very end. Clinicals expects you to know the pathophysiologies behind diseases - they don't reteach you what you should have learned in the classroom. In that aspect, I can see the good in being tested prior to third year. What benefit do students get by bypassing this exam?

Most importantly though, I do not see it being helpful to IMG/FMG medical students. The Step score is really what separates students from each other and is a level playing field for us all. Without the Step scores (as there were talks of making it Pass/Fail), I believe it would make things even harder for us and put yet another obstacle in our way. How will they distinguish the students for applying for special rotations or residency? What if a Ross student with a 230 Step and a US student with a 210 applied for a spot. Both would say "Pass" and my guess is that the US student would be taken above the other. It sucks because as of right now, our Step score is pretty much the the only major thing that we have going for us. It seems competition for us to stay at the same level in our applications would be more difficult. Seeing a "P", there is no way to tell if it was a 185 or a 240! Truth be told, I am not sure how Step 2 scores are ranked. I don't know if they will just use those scores or what, but overall I am not seeing a reason to fix what isn't broken - at least to me. I am not quite sure what brought about this thought for change...

Oy... I really think things are fine the way they are but that's just my opinion. As of right now though, I am about to get back to lovely hematology/oncology and work on until that exam 10 days from now... I can't wait for it to be over but more importantly to get that passing score!

Seeing a bit of light...

Well practice NBME #2 is over and was harder than the last. Last time I took form 4 and this time it was form 3. I won't give details about each because I don't want to give away any hints to ruin anyone's experiences with them but I thought 3 was a toughie! Ironically, I did... better! It was such a surprise and a great relief. My studying method is paying off! Last exam I got a 340, equivalent to a 175 on the Step. Not so good at all. This time? Still not as high as I want but a 390, equivalent to a 190. We are getting there folks! I am still planning on taking at least one more exam before the COMP but if I can improve 15 pts. in nearly 2-2.5 weeks, I am very optimistic for my next exam. Also - this made the difference between a pass or fail of the USMLE Step 1! According to my exam, I can pass the Step! Of course, I am don't feel like I can just rely or settle on that but it was such a great feeling to know that it IS possible to do! Next time, if I could break 200, I would be so very happy!

I know to some people these scores aren't anything to smile about but not to me - I am happy with my improvement and am ready to get studying again. I was a bit hesitant of posting my scores as I know others are scoring much higher than I am now. I am proud of myself though, as I am historically not the best test taker, but I am also doing this for others. So often you just see people who post their awesome scores and it really used to leave me feeling low. It seemed like everyone was scoring high because, well frankly, those who were average just wouldn't bother posting their score for others to see. Well, I am here to show all what hard work does and progress looks like! Hopefully it will help someone who might not be so lucky as to have exams come naturally to them. Just have to keep working, keep swimming (Finding Nemo!) and just push on when you feel like you can't do it anymore! So cliche and until I can come up with a better line of advice - if I can do it - YOU CAN TOO!

So for those studying for shelf exams, minis and even the COMP coming up - keep going!!! You are almost there!!! Don't give up!!! Take a break if you must, get a nice meal or go buy some good junk food to study with but keep going!!!

I will keep you all updated for my further progress! Looking foward to giving more good news!